All Artists Have Both

Tomorrow there is a very important symposium. "Everything You Wanted To Know About Live Art But Were Afraid To Ask... is a day of information and advice about Live Art aimed at recent graduates, emergent artists, and anybody who is interested in finding out more about Live Art." This kind of event is vital for all performance artists and anyone interested in Live Art.

WebsterGotts are well known for their advocacy of Live Art Symposia. They would recommend that anyone who can go, does, as there are many prominent and inspiring Artists talking, particularly Franko B and our favourite Lisa Watts. It is a crying shame that WebsterGotts are unable to attend tomorrow's event. However, in their absence, WebsterGotts pray that somebody will ask the most important burning question that haunts Live Art in these dark times.

"Do ALL Live Artists have both Male and Female genital organs?"

Observe these detailed studies of the different kinds of Live Artists. All appear to have developed extra reproductive glands of the opposite sex, the further they have sunk into the world of Live Art.

Consider all the different species of Live Artist;

The Screaming Angst-Ridden Naked Girl Who Covers Herself In Paint


The Wild-Haired Bearded American Who Stands Next To Tables


The Angry Political-Protest-as-Live-Art Loudmouth Know-it-All


The Middle Aged Dancer Who Cries and Gives You Pathetic Gifts


The Socially Repellent Recluse Who Locks Himself Up and Documents The Same Thing Every Day For a Year


The Artist Who Actually Has Mental Problems and Thinks it's Clever to Shit on a Floor and Make People Watch



Of course, the whole point of Live Art and Performance Art is to make the audience feel as uncomfortable and confused as possible. Perhaps this is why the true Live Artist has evolved to possess both sets of genitals.