Sunday, April 26, 2009

Beard Update

The beards are in full swing!

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As you can see from the above images, Webster's facial fuzz is well on the way to becoming a genuine beard. The growth is thick, and the russet colour gives it strength and meaning. However, the rate of growth is a little slow, but the wait will be worth it for a luxurious, full-bodied face rug.

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Gotts's beard is rather different. Although the speed at which the hair is racing form the skin is great, it is also sporadic. This gives the effect of a straggly beard that lacks colour, depth and motivation. But from a distance, the overall look is becoming impressive, and it can only improve with time.

Both Webster and Gotts are now beginning to experience the 'Moustache curl-back', where the hair of the upper lip grows to such a length that it curls back into the lip, occasionally causing mild discomfort. This is nowhere near as serious as, say, a rabbit's ingrowing tooth. Both artists have decided to go along the route of non-tash-trimming, to instead perform a 'side-sweep' action that will hopefully encourage the hair to direct itself sideways, across the lip, resulting in a fine example of a moustache. It is possible that moustache wax will soon be required.

As far as problems go, the main setbacks appear to be the eating of breakfast cereals. Webster has reported a 'slopping of milk' around his face-garden. This very morning, Gotts almost left the house with a blob of porridge stuck to his hair-bib. Pastries are also becoming an issue.

Friday, April 17, 2009

Birthday Beard-Off Update

It's been ten days of hard beard-growing. WebsterGotts have been straining their faces and eating their crusts, all razors have been chucked and chin shampoo has been poured, with stunning results.

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As you can see from these images, beard-growing is not all fun and games. The pitfalls of biscuit crumbs and the horrors of cappuccino froth are plain to see. This is ok for Webster who can rely on the support of a long-term partner, but Gotts is aware that he will have to scrap all romantic notions for the next few months.

RULES

Remember, this is not a race, but a test of endurance. However, gentlemanly admiration will be awarded for style, shape, colour and bushiness. There are some rules to this competition.

1a. There will be absolutely no trimming of the beard area.
b. Modest trimming of the moustache area is permitted, but this may detract from the overall effect.
c. Trimming of the neck area is permitted, perhaps necessary to retain a job and home. However, trimming must not pass the upper jawline mark.

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2a. The contest must continue until one of the contestants buckles and shaves.
b. There will be a stiff penalty for the offending shaver, to be decided in time.
c. Less serious penalties will be dished out for illegal or excessive trimming.

3a. Photographs must be taken each week to document the beardy progress.
b. Compliments and condemnations must be noted and reported on the blog.
c. Followers of the blog may offer encourage, support, praise and ideas for punishments, by clicking on the 'comments' link.

WebsterGotts believe that growing strong facial hair will strengthen their artistic appearance and recognition. All the best artists have great facial hair. Fact.

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Tuesday, April 07, 2009

A Celebratory Beard-Off!

Good day to you all!

The WebsterGotts Art Blog is 2 years old this month! Instead of last years debauched piss-up, WebsterGotts have decided to celebrate this landmark with a series of events and projects, the first of which is the world-famous WebsterGotts Beard-Off!!!

In a homage to Tehching Hsieh (a very influential artist to WG), WebsterGotts have challenged one another to grow their facial hair for as long as they can bear, the first to buckle and shave shall be the loser! The contest shall be documented with regular photos of the face gardening progress on THIS BLOG!

Contestant WEBSTER:
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Contestant GOTTS:
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As you can see, their efforts are so far rather puny. But Gotts has a clear head start over Webster. No matter, this is not a race, but a test of endurance. Who can tolerate a beard over the summer months the longest?!